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tomoatmeal: I was loitering all right, but when the cop asked me about it I said no way.  “I’m just a door-to-door salesman,” I lied.  “I sell Jacuzzis.” “Do you install them, too?” “I sure do.” The cop then followed me into the liquor store and planted himself by the door; watching as I launched into an improvised sales pitch to the old man behind the register.  I described the different shapes and styles of Jacuzzis as well as the various price ranges.  I told him what was popular and what the options were with water jets.  “I think I like the one with just the two jets,” said the old man. “Oh come on, man - two jets?!,” I shook my head, disappointed.  “If you really only want two jets you may as well just run over to the hardware store and get yourself one of those little pans you soak your feet in.” The old man laughed nervously. “I should really talk to my wife…” I rolled my eyes.  ”Wow.  You run every little decision by your wife first?” “Fine,” he said firmly.  “I’ll take the one with ten jets.” I grinned and patted him hard on the shoulder. “That’s what I’m talking about!” About a week later, with the cop watching everything, I had managed to dig a pretty respectable-sized hole in the floor of the liquor store, but the work was hard and it was difficult for me to envision how to build functional water jets.   “Okay,” I said to the cop.  “You win.  I was loitering.”

tomoatmeal:

I was loitering all right, but when the cop asked me about it I said no way. 

“I’m just a door-to-door salesman,” I lied.  “I sell Jacuzzis.”

“Do you install them, too?”

“I sure do.”

The cop then followed me into the liquor store and planted himself by the door; watching as I launched into an improvised sales pitch to the old man behind the register.  I described the different shapes and styles of Jacuzzis as well as the various price ranges.  I told him what was popular and what the options were with water jets. 

“I think I like the one with just the two jets,” said the old man.

“Oh come on, man - two jets?!,” I shook my head, disappointed.  “If you really only want two jets you may as well just run over to the hardware store and get yourself one of those little pans you soak your feet in.”

The old man laughed nervously.

“I should really talk to my wife…”

I rolled my eyes.  ”Wow.  You run every little decision by your wife first?”

“Fine,” he said firmly.  “I’ll take the one with ten jets.”

I grinned and patted him hard on the shoulder.

“That’s what I’m talking about!”

About a week later, with the cop watching everything, I had managed to dig a pretty respectable-sized hole in the floor of the liquor store, but the work was hard and it was difficult for me to envision how to build functional water jets.  

“Okay,” I said to the cop.  “You win.  I was loitering.”

(via stonerparty)

63,051 notes

pilosopogyno: This man, James Verone, robbed a bank for one dollar. Why only one dollar? Because he knew that in prison he could get the medical care he could not afford with his part time salary as a convenience store clerk. He was approved for food stamps, but they did little to help his finances. Between his back problems, carpel tunnel, and arthritis, he simply couldn’t handle the pain any longer. On June 9th, he sent a letter to his local paper, the Gaston Gazette, that stated: “When you receive this a bank robbery will have been committed by me. this robbery is being committed by me for one dollar. I am of sound mind but not so much sound body.” He then took a cab to the RBC Bank, and handed the teller a note asking for one dollar and medical attention. He quietly took a seat in the lobby and waited for police to arrive. Since Verone only stole one dollar, he was only charged with larceny. His bail, which he doesn’t plan to pay is set at $2,000, reduced from the normal $100,000. He’s scheduled to see a doctor this Friday, and hopes to get foot surgery, back surgery and to have a protrusion on his check treated.    To me, this is the perfect example of how disturbingly corrupt and unjust our health care system has become under HMO’s. For this man, or any person for that matter, feels that he needs to be imprisoned just to see a doctor, is ridiculous.  This is exactly what I hate about America. Why is it that you can buy an entire house with money you don’t have, but still can’t apply for health care if you don’t meet the requirements? That’s messed up.

pilosopogyno:

This man, James Verone, robbed a bank for one dollar. Why only one dollar? Because he knew that in prison he could get the medical care he could not afford with his part time salary as a convenience store clerk. He was approved for food stamps, but they did little to help his finances. Between his back problems, carpel tunnel, and arthritis, he simply couldn’t handle the pain any longer.

On June 9th, he sent a letter to his local paper, the Gaston Gazette, that stated: “When you receive this a bank robbery will have been committed by me. this robbery is being committed by me for one dollar. I am of sound mind but not so much sound body.”

He then took a cab to the RBC Bank, and handed the teller a note asking for one dollar and medical attention. He quietly took a seat in the lobby and waited for police to arrive.

Since Verone only stole one dollar, he was only charged with larceny. His bail, which he doesn’t plan to pay is set at $2,000, reduced from the normal $100,000. He’s scheduled to see a doctor this Friday, and hopes to get foot surgery, back surgery and to have a protrusion on his check treated.   

To me, this is the perfect example of how disturbingly corrupt and unjust our health care system has become under HMO’s. For this man, or any person for that matter, feels that he needs to be imprisoned just to see a doctor, is ridiculous. 

This is exactly what I hate about America. Why is it that you can buy an entire house with money you don’t have, but still can’t apply for health care if you don’t meet the requirements? That’s messed up.

(via bluntasaurus-sex)